Posts Tagged ‘comedy’

Six most outrageous moments in the 2022 On Cinema Oscar Special

April 2nd, 2022

Airing live in its second year on HEI Network, the 9th Annual On Cinema Oscar Special was pared down in a number of ways… most notably they had to film it outside, according to Tim, because Joe Estevez had mismanaged Tim’s HEI Ranch development and no sound stage had been built.

Things only go downhill from this rough introduction with Mark Proksch dressed as Spider-Man, accidentally tripping and falling down a hill.

No longer wearing a fancy suit, Tim is now sunburned and wearing sunglasses, a vest, and blue jeans — your typical uniform for a conservative who’s trying to dress like a man of the people.

This will include spoilers.

If you haven’t caught up on season 12, the main things that happened since the last Oscar Special are that Mark Proksch reluctantly returned, LaRoux is in a wheelchair now, Wendy Kerby left after Tim made creepy remarks to her, and Toni filed for divorce from Tim after becoming sober.

So here we go: the top six most outrageous moments in the 9th Annual On Cinema Oscar Special.

 

 

6. Tribute to Alfred Hitchcock

To commemorate the 100th anniversary of Hitchcock’s first film (which was never finished) they interview actress Lee Garlington from the 2nd and 3rd Psycho movies — which Hitchcock had nothing to do with.

Mark was set to appear as Hitchcock but he has to do it via a video call from the hospital due to his previous injury falling down the hill. Another person dressed as Hitchcock held an iPad in front of their face to share the video call.

 

 

5. Toni’s therapy tape

Tim had LaRoux “up his dose” of painkillers so he could enter therapy to spy on Tim’s wife as she went through her recovery from alcoholism.

Footage from Toni’s therapy session makes Tim look really bad. Most damningly, Toni reveals that everyone talks shit about Tim behind his back — including his loyal band mates. This doesn’t appear to be a surprise to anyone but Tim who refuses to believe it.

 

 

4. Willy Wonka tribute

Gregg’s Willy Wonka tributes are all over the place, from dressing up as Johnny Depp’s version of the character to staging his own version of the grandparent’s scene in the original movie.

The latter segment is a huge disappointment for Tim, who doesn’t understand what any of this had to do with the upcoming prequel and just wants to see “chocolate and Oompa Loompas.”

 

 

3. Oscar Doctor

Years ago Gregg advocated for a fan favorite “popular film” category for the Oscars.

Feeling irrationally vindicated now that this has actually happened, Gregg has an “Oscar Doctor” segment in which he offers solutions to bring audiences back to watch the Oscars. All of his ideas are simplistic new awards like “Best Ending” or “Best Robot.”

 

 

2. Dekkar reunion

Following up from the Wendy Kerby Valentine’s Day Special, Tim’s band Dekkar has reunited as a rock band with long term members Axiom and Manuel.

This reunion happens through several segments throughout the special. In one segment it’s revealed that former member Nick passed away. In the hastily made homage video Tim repeatedly mixes up Vinny with Nick. In pre-taped segments we also learn that Tim only sees his band mates as hired hands for his solo project.

The Dekkar reunion culminates in a show, which includes an new “Oscar Medley” jam-style song about movies nominated for Oscars this year. They finally finish on their one and only “hit” song, Empty Bottle, only for the power to go out. (For some reason the mics and cameras keep working.)

 

 

1. The wild ending

Throughout the special, troublemakers show up and drive an ATV behind the set and point laser pointers at Tim and others. It’s eventually revealed this same group is likely behind the power outage.

After hearing some gunshots, everyone takes cover. Gregg heroically evacuates everyone he can on his VFA tour bus. Meanwhile Tim has a meltdown in front of the aggressors, begging them to kill him before the screen goes black and the credits roll.

 

Honorable mentions

  • Axiom’s national anthem-style rendition of Tim’s “Oscar Fever.”
  • Longtime chili-based caterer Hank is back! Once again he’s getting a poor deal from Tim, despite being the proprietor of the upcoming HEI Noon Chili Saloon at HEI Ranch.
  • Tim hired contractor Joe Crane to drill a water well in HEI Ranch. Unfortunately, the liquid that comes out is brown and stinks, and Joe Crane admits he may have simply drilled into a septic tank.
  • Tim flubbing yet another actor’s name: “Benedict Pumpkinpatch.”
  • LaRoux getting his wheelchair stuck in the dirt while everyone watches and the theme song from his TV show “Xposed” plays in the background.
  • During “On Cinema’s Tribute To Director Cameos” we end on a segment from the movie Jack & Jill where Adam Sandler’s character has a conversation with sex offender and former Subway spokesman Jared Fogle.

I got to see this Oscar Special on the big screen again, this time at the New Parkway Theater in Uptown Oakland. Unfortunately the video stream was super unstable again this year, so I had to go back and watch it again (especially the first 20 minutes or so) after they put up the final cut online.

It’s sad that the stream had so many technical issues this year, because to be honest On Cinema’s absurd “coverage” of the Oscars is always going to be funnier and somehow more relevant than the real thing, no matter which actor slaps which comedian.

Eric Andre: Legalize Everything review

June 28th, 2020
Trailer for Legalize Everything

If you’re familiar with Eric Andre, you probably recognize him from The Eric Andre Show. If not let me explain: his eponymous show is like an inverted talk show; instead of going for an hour or two, each episode is 15 minutes. Instead of trying to make the guests feel comfortable, he does the exact opposite. It’s a mix of fast-paced cringe humor and straight up surrealism — in one episode he murders his co-host Hannibal Buress which somehow leads into a Twin Peaks homage — and I’d be lying if I said that was the weirdest part of the episode. So as you can imagine it’s not your typical talk show.

I’d never seen Andre’s standup before so I didn’t know quite what to expect from his first comedy special, Eric Andre: Legalize Everything on Netflix. Was this going to be a live version of The Eric Andre Show, or more conventional standup material? The answer: a little from column A, a little from column B.

Filmed in New Orleans shortly before the COVID-19 pandemic and before the murders of Breonna Taylor, George Floyd, and far too many more Black Americans by police, Legalize Everything is a standup special that by some strange coincidence was released at the moment it was needed most.

First, we haven’t had live comedy shows to see in months and probably won’t again in the near future, so new comedy specials are a welcome rarity right now. Second, the half Black half Jewish (or in his words, “bluish”) comedian Eric Andre has a unique perspective fit for the current era. One of the most biting jokes in the entire special is in the trailer above in which Andre makes fun of how the TV show COPS glorifies police brutality against anyone who’s not white and/or wealthy, all to the tune of the most incongruous theme music possible.

 

Mild spoilers for Legalize Everything below.

 

The show opens with a sketch, as many standup specials do these days. This sketch seems straight out of The Eric Andre Show, with Andre impersonating a cop who’s drunk and offering people hits from a giant bong.

Once he hits the stage Andre tackles a wide variety of subjects with his signature frantic intensity: bad drug drips, being mistaken for two men at the same time, bizarre sexual experiences, the horrors of Calvinism in American history, etc.

Throughout Legalize Everything Andre calls out members of the audience for random and uncomfortable reasons, though never devolves into insult humor. In one case he even takes the phone from a volunteer to send text messages. This type of material subverts the expectations of standup comedy — nobody can heckle a comedian who’s preemptively heckling the audience.

 

End spoilers.

 

Though a couple of the jokes don’t quite land as hard as they might have, everything works here. There’s no question Eric Andre had refined his set by the time this special was filmed and he’s giving it his all in his performance.

Standup comedy is inherently character driven; the comedian is playing a caricature (often but not always of themselves) who tells jokes that speak to the truth of the character in some humorous way. In Andre’s case his caricature is that of an outsider with the energy of a coked-up lunatic who’s armed to the teeth with nuclear truth bombs.

Comedy is also about timing. It’s hard to imagine this special landing at a better time, as Andre squeezes humor out of timely subjects such as America’s racism, poverty, and historical context. Would you be surprised if I told you this special was filmed back in November of 2019? Of course little has changed since then, we’re just more outraged about it now.

I think the audience for Legalize Everything will probably be fairly self-selecting, but even those who aren’t familiar with Andre will likely find solid material to laugh at here — more than can be said for your average Netflix comedy special. If nothing else it’s certainly an hour long spectacle to gawk at.

Personally, Legalize Everything was easily captivating enough to hold my attention, funny enough to make me laugh hard many times, and perhaps most astonishingly, deep enough to make me think — the latter of which are words I can’t believe I’m saying about Eric Andre of all people. There’s no way I give this any less than a perfect score, this is the comedy special we needed right when we needed it.

Rating: 10/10

The Two Commandments

May 23rd, 2011

With all this “rapture” nonsense over the weekend, I thought it was a good time to re-visit a classic George Carlin bit in which he narrows the 10 commandments down to a much more reasonable number, simply by cutting out the crap.

On Dane Cook’s “comedy” career

October 7th, 2009

The funny thing about Dane Cook is that he’s not funny.  This would be unremarkable were it not for his comedy albums, films, and TV specials.

How can a comedian who isn’t funny be so popular?

This was bothering me a while ago, but I’ve finally realized that every Cook fan I’d ever met was a frat guy. I think that explains it.

Here’s my screenplay of how Cook became famous. Imagine this happening in every dorm across the country.

INT. ROWDY FRAT HOUSE - NIGHT

   A party is taking place.  FRAT GUY is looking for action
   and SORORITY GIRL is bored and watching TV.  Dane Cook is on.
   SORORITY GIRL is staring at the screen.

           FRAT GUY approaches SORORITY GIRL.

                       FRAT GUY
           Hey, what's up?

                     SORORITY GIRL
                       (drinking)
           Watching Dane Cook.  He's funny!

                       FRAT GUY
                      (oblivious)
           Oh, yeah... um.  Dane Cook!  He's
           great.  Like that one thing he
           does, um...

                     SORORITY GIRL
           Could you hand me that beer?

                       FRAT GUY
                 (Hands her a beer and
                  sits next to her)
           Sure, here.

           She chugs the beer quickly.

                     SORORITY GIRL
           Ahh. Oh man.  Oh.  Hey.... you're
           so hot, I wanna **** *** **** ***
           ***!

   Sorority Girl smiles drunkenly and goes down out of the
   frame.  Frat Guy stretches and smiles in contentment.


INT. RECORD STORE - DAY

   In the comedy isle, FRAT GUY picks up every Dane Cook CD
   they have and puts it into his basket.


EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS - DAY

   Outside a building, FRAT GUY is standing around waiting.
   SORORITY GIRL exits the door and he meets up with her.

                     FRAT GUY
           Hey, what's up?

                  SORORITY GIRL
                    (startled)
           Oh... uh.  Hi.  Not much.

                     FRAT GUY
           Hey, remember how you said you like
           Dane Cook?  Well I was just listening
           to his CDs and...

                  SORORITY GIRL
                   (confused)
           Dane who?  What are you talking about?

                   FRAT GUY
           I um... so you wanna...

                  SORORITY GIRL
                    (annoyed)
           Uh, I gotta go.

 

Makes sense? I hope so, because if that doesn’t explain Dane Cook, then I don’t know what does.