Burlesque dancers performed on stage while sweaty crowds danced to the thumping rhythms, spun by a pair of DJs dressed in banana costumes. As the room filled with artificial fog, one costumed attendee after another came up to me and shouted one of the following questions over the music:
- Who are you supposed to be?
- How did you make that portal gun?
- Can I take a photo with you?
Halloween 2026 was a day of chaotic energy in San Francisco: it started with the Valkyries, our new WNBA team, winning their first title. The excitement from their fans intersected with the mobs of costumed partygoers attending outdoor Halloween events including the annual Danceoween here in the Mission.
After making my way out of the neighborhood I went to the nightlife corridor on 11th Street and stood in a very long line to get into All Hallow’s Eve at DNA Lounge. I already had a ticket, and I was going to participate in the costume contest even if it meant shoving my way through the crowd to get to the stage. Sure, I knew I had no chance of winning — and spoiler alert: I did not win — but I still wanted the bragging rights of having participated.
How did we get here?
Let’s rewind to September when I was in Los Angeles. I had to quickly think of something to spray paint on a wall and came up with a reference to the Portal video games. This got the gears turning in my head for a Halloween costume — what if I did something Portal-related?
Not everyone would get the reference, of course. I knew that going in. The first game came out in 2007, the second in 2011. Unless you were playing video games 15-20 years ago, you’ve probably never heard of Portal. But for those of us who played the game, it tends to stand out as one of the classics from that era for its style, game design, and sense of humor.
How would I translate the Portal games into a costume? GLaDOS was my first instinct. A sarcastic, evil AI who conducts experiments on human test subjects seems fitting in 2026. But that’s a complex costume (not to mention that she hangs from the ceiling!) and I’d really need some type of voice changer to pull off the autotuned robot voice effect.
Then it struck me that it would be much simpler to put together a Chell costume, as her defining characteristic is really the portal gun, or “handheld portal device.”
Let’s dig into the construction process:
I knew right away that I wanted to make this out of reclaimed materials — ideally straight out of the trash. The austerity era of Aperture Science, if you will. Here’s what I used and how I assembled it all.
- The front of the gun and the handle were a broken flashlight I bought at a thrift store for $1, sawed in half, and painted black.
- The pipe running through the bottle is a PVC pipe cut to size and filled with epoxy in one end. I used the same orange paint from the Assassin’s Creed costume I made back in 2014. The paint glows under a blacklight, making it perfect for nightclubs.
- A skinny clear plastic soda bottle goes over the pipe. Pieces cut from a two liter bottle painted white form the upper and lower covers.
- On the front end, I drove a screw through the part of the flashlight where the light bulb would have gone through the bottom of the plastic bottle and into the epoxy end of the pipe, holding the three together.
- I cut a hole in the flashlight housing with a Dremel, stuck the other end of the pipe through, and bolted it in place with screws and epoxy to hedge my bets. It was vital that the pipe and flashlight handle remain firmly together.
- I also epoxied the top of the clear soda bottle to the flashlight handle so it wouldn’t move. I then painted the epoxy black with nail polish.
- The wires were the toughest part, but they also served to hold the pieces in place through friction. Let me break down how they’re threaded:
- All three wires start from inside the flashlight handle poking up or sideways through the upper white cover.
- Each of them bends around the outside, which I wrapped in flexible tubing and secured with cable ties.
- The lower two wires then go through the lower white cover in the front.
- All of the wires go through the front housing of the flashlight, bend around, then come out of the adjacent hole so they’re threaded in a circle. This is what holds them in place in the front.
- The two lower wires go back out through the front white cover piece.
- All three wires bend forward and have alligator clips attached to mimic the “field manipulator” on Chell’s gun.
Here’s the crazy part: not only did the portal gun hold together, but after being out for several hours — not to mention walking home at 2 AM in the rain — every single piece remained securely attached. A little bent, but attached nonetheless.
As for the rest of the costume? Nothing fancy.
I wore a mix of items I already had (boots, a skin-tight undershirt, a fishnet t-shirt) combined with thrifted baggy orange pants and an Aperture Laboratories tank top from Etsy. Very straightforward.
Clearly this would all be a better fit on a woman, but as a semi-androgynous looking male, dressing up as a female character isn’t exactly much of a stretch — especially a tall, athletic woman like Chell. (On the other hand, I’d make a poor excuse for an Incredible Hulk.)
Some ideas if you consider this costume:
- GLaDOS + Chell would make a fantastic couple’s costume.
- Other props to consider include a companion cube or Wheatley. But I think either of those and the portal gun would be too much for one person to carry around.
- The metal strips on the back of Chell’s boots would have been a tripping hazard in a dark environment. I was glad I didn’t try that. I had enough people tripping over my regular boots.
While the costume contest didn’t go my way, it was fun to hear everyone’s reactions. At the end of the night, a pair of guys stopped me as they were being kicked out of a bar after last call — one of them asked if the portal gun worked. Before I could reply, the other offered that “it doesn’t work when it gets wet.” I’ll have to remember that line the next time I’m wearing a silly costume in the rain.
